Bedtime Resistance

Bed Time Resistance is, as the title suggests, the behaviour experienced when a child regularly does not accept the parents view that it is time for bed and will attempt to procrastinate. He/she wants another story, another game, to remain downstairs with the rest of the family or to have "just 5 minutes more TV." Does it sound familiar?

Children may do this occasionally and it is in some ways natural. A part of life and parenting that can sometimes amuse and make us laugh a little. Maybe we remember how we felt when we were at that stage. Unfortunately, when it becomes a regular occurrence and the parents are stressed and tired, they start to dread the battle before their child or children settle. This can be fuelled by anger and frustration on the parents part and it escalates into a bedtime conflict, with the danger that serious issues can easily result from this.

If this applies to your family you should consider the following;-

• Are you consistently following the Good Sleep Hygiene Guidelines?
• Does your child have a short (20minute) routine before bed?
• Has your child learned to go to bed drowsy but awake?
• Does your child see his/her bedroom seen as a safe, quiet place?
• Is your child afraid of going to bed?

Don't Panic! There are a rich variety of techniques and strategies you could use to achieve bed time acceptance and resolve the bedtime battles.

Contact us at www.Dream-Angus.com for advice and support.

Controlled Crying

'Controlled crying' is the name given to a recognised behavioural management technique which is becoming more popular today. Its application works towards the "extinction" of an unwanted behaviour that may have been learned by the child over time and/or inadvertently encouraged by the parent. Checking on the child is done at progressively longer intervals and a minimal intervention technique is used during these "checks". The principal is simply that the child should not get a positive response from this crying i.e. a reward or parental attention. Thus the child learns that there is no benefit to crying for a prolonged period.
Success rate
This technique is effective if consistently applied. Both parents or carers need to be fully in agreement and work together to use it. There is no point in trying this technique if you cannot tolerate your child crying. One must remain calm and appear unaffected by the child's apparent distress. This can be too difficult for some parents to endure because it can be quite stressful. For these parents different techniques can be applied.

Controlled Crying is useful when the parents are sure that the crying is a result of the child's temperament or when the child is resistant to bedtime. This is a technique that should not be used for children under 18 months to 2 years, except in exceptional circumstances, as it can create feelings of insecurity or abandonment.

Visit www.Dream-Angus.com for more information and support. We offer a free, no obligation, chart to use if you are attempting to implement this technique.

Sleep and the newborn baby

Newborn babies often seem to turn night into day. Many new mums struggle to cope with their own sleep deficit while settling baby and coming to terms with the changes this new life brings.

Babies born at term (when they were due/not premature) should sleep for 16 to 20 hours a day. Premature babies may sleep more. The sleep periods usually last 3 to 4 hours and waking is most commonly due to hunger. Breast fed babies may sleep for shorter periods because breast milk, which is definitely the best, is more easily digested. Wake times are usually short, 1-2 hours wakefulness. When fed and changed baby should settle to sleep within 10-15 minutes.


Mum's sleep
If at all possible mum's should aim to catch up on their own sleep while baby sleeps.

Teaching baby to sleep.
It is helpful if parents learn to recognise when baby is displaying sleepy signals and, while baby is awake but drowsy, put the baby down to sleep so that baby learns early on to self sooth.

It is unlikely that a routine can be firmly established before 12 weeks of age. Babies have no memories and insufficient experience of life to know that when they cry, someone will come and feed/change them. This requires learning which is accomplished when, over a period of time, the baby's experience shows that mum comes when baby cries and that his/her needs are met when they are signaled.

Visit www.Dream-Angus.com for further advice and support options

The Baby's Song T.Gunn

From the private ease of mother's womb

I fall into a lighted room

Why don't you simply put me back

Where it is warm and wet and black

Padded and jolly I would ride

The perfect comfort of her inside

They tuck me in a rustling bed

I lie there,, raging, small and red.